What’s Your Dreamkiller?

I love that I can eat a salad of fresh greens grown by my own hand for dinner. It is so satisfying to garden; it feeds my belly and my soul.  Interesting, though, this is the first time I’ve had my own garden.

Why didn’t I start sooner…? 

My stepfather was a traditional Nebraska farm boy and with 9 kids still at home, there were a lot of hungry mouths to feed. Our home sat on a sizable plot and his legendary garden covered half an acre. I can still taste the crisp fresh cucumbers.

He offered to teach me to garden if I wanted… and I wanted. We marked off a small plot, enough for an elementary school kid to handle.

I worked hard to get the ground ready. While I dug, I imagined the bounty. He suggested I grow carrots and radishes since they sprout and mature quickly. I could see them in neat rows with their feathery green tops. I would have a fine patch.

On planting day, I traipsed out to find the seed packets strewn all over my waiting garden plot. There were no rows where carrots marched separately from the radishes as they should.   The seeds were just thrown everywhere!

It was easy to surmise the truth. My stinky little sister planted everything.  Mind you, she was probably 6 years old to my 8.  It was ruined! No fair! I did all the work and didn’t get to plant! And they’re supposed to be in rows! A garden is supposed to have rows!

I was so distraught at the utter unfairness, the complete ruination of my plans and the sheer audacity of her to shatter my dreams in so brutal a fashion that I declared, “I’ll Never Garden Again!”

So I didn’t.  

And now, many years later, I’m finally opening myself to something I instinctively knew early on would satisfy my soul.

I let the Dreamkillers take over my Garden Dream that day. Perfectionism over those straight garden rows, yep, a Dreamkiller. And blame. I blamed her for messing it up. It was (sniff!) all her fault that I never gardened. Until now.

What are Dreamkillers?

Dreamkillers are anything that gets between you and your dream. Dreamkillers are like magnets that pull your focus away from your hearts’s desire and cause you to do everything except what needs doing.

Dreamkillers can be habits of blaming, poor choices, or time-wasting activities (I’m looking at you Facebook! pun intended)  They can be automatic responses like always being first to volunteer, or getting angry over a slight, or even feeling sorry for yourself.  Our habits and automatic responses can run our life.

A Dreamkiller could show up as your drug of choice. Some favorites are sugar, tobacco, caffeine, chocolate, alcohol, TV, social media… they’re all stimulating the pleasure centers of your brain.  Even positive things can act like a drug (workout junkie anyone?)  Any “drug” that diverts your attention away from your dream or causes you to avoid taking action is a Dreamkiller.

5 Hacks to Defend Against Your Dreamkillers

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4 Replies to "What's Your Dreamkiller?"

  • Jen lewis
    September 7, 2017 (11:56 pm)

    So well written; and a perfect, personal analogy. I will have to share this. . .

    • Debra
      September 8, 2017 (8:42 pm)

      Thanks Jen. Those Dreamkillers start young, don’t they? And thank you so much for sharing – it’s means a lot!

  • Edie DeVilbiss
    September 8, 2017 (2:31 am)

    My apologies for ruining your farming career. I never did garden either. It’s probably your fault for making me feel so bad that I scattered the seeds. I’m sure it was in a biblical manner… only one in four survived. Love you, Sis! I can hardly wait for your webinars.

    • Debra
      September 8, 2017 (8:41 pm)

      Edie! HAHAHA~ I didn’t think you even remembered. You’re completely forgiven! Now that you mention it, I’m sure it must be my fault. We have the same Blame Dreamkiller – right? Can’t wait to start the webinars! I’ve had such a fun time gathering tools and information from all kinds of sources (my own brain included, of course!). I truly hope it’s useful and that you walk away with new tools and perspectives! Keep planting those seeds 😀

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